A story about parenting, trust, and the quiet strength of letting go of control.
By: A Mindful Dad’s Life
Last Thursday morning started with a drizzle and a dilemma.
Not heavy rain — just that fine mist that lingers in the air and makes everything feel damp.
Before we even finished breakfast, I got a text from the school:
“Please remember to send your kids to school with clothing appropriate for the weather as we hope to get outside today!!!”
Triple exclamation points. Message received.
I looked at my son, my 8-year-old, full of energy and opinions. His raincoat was already waiting by the door. But instead of slipping it on like I’d hoped, he tossed it over his shoulder and said flatly:
“I don’t want to wear it.”
I kept it calm.
“It’s wet out today. You might get cold.”
That’s when he looked up at me and said something I didn’t expect:
“I know my body better than you do.”
He didn’t say it to be rude. There was no attitude in his voice.
Just a simple, honest statement of belief. One that made me pause more than I care to admit.
The Crossroads
Many of us have been raised with the story that when kids push back like this — and probably in the minds of those three-exclamation-point school staff — I was supposed to “be the parent.”
Lay down the law.
Insist on the coat.
Prove that I know what’s best.
But here’s the thing: I’ve been trying to raise my son to listen to himself.
To pay attention to what his body feels, to what his instincts tell him, and to trust his own judgment — even when it contradicts mine.
So this was the moment of truth:
Do I trust my son enough to let him be wrong?
Do I respect him enough to let him have a voice?
Do I trust him enough to let him be right, even when it challenges my authority?
The Walk to School
The coat didn’t stay on the hook — but it didn’t go on his back either. It landed in his backpack, right where we both agreed it should be. I am, after all, also trying to teach him to always be prepared.
We walked together in the light drizzle. He was fine.
Maybe a little wet by the time we reached the school doors — but smiling. Confident. Proud.
And me? I didn’t feel like I’d lost the raincoat fight.
I felt like I’d just passed a different kind of test.
The Bigger Picture
This wasn’t about a coat.
It was about trust. Autonomy.
It was about making space for a child to begin becoming who they are — not just who we tell them to be.
The world will give my son plenty of opportunities to conform.
It will try to tell him what to wear, what to think, how to feel.
But in this house — in this moment — I want him to know what it feels like to be trusted.
Because if he learns that now,
maybe someday, when someone tries to control him through fear or shame or pressure…
he’ll remember what it felt like to say, “I know my body (and myself) better than you do.”
And he’ll believe it.
Closing Reflection
Some days, parenting isn’t about teaching your child what to do.
It’s about showing them what it looks like to trust themself — and to trust others.
Even when the school text says otherwise.
Even when you’re afraid they’ll get cold.
Even when you want to be in control.
The raincoat stayed in his backpack for the day.
And Bear walked tall.
That’s a win in my book.
Mindful Dad Life 