For me, Fall always brings a mix of melancholy and excitement. It means saying goodbye to Summer, but also welcoming back the cool nights, crisp mornings, and warm days of Autumn. I look forward to the blaze of colour in the trees, the earlier dusk, and the quiet comfort of Fall nights.

This year, though, the season feels different. With my son’s time now shared between his mother and me, the familiar rhythm of our traditions has shifted. I feel the absence of what we used to do together, like apple picking, pumpkin carving, and hikes on trails littered with golden leaves. These memories still live in me, but they also remind me of what’s changed.

It would be easy to sit in that loss. To focus on what isn’t the same anymore. But Fall itself is all about change; it embodies it. So, I’ve decided this is the year to create new rituals with my son.

Some will be echoes of the old. We’ll go apple picking together, even if it means he’s already been with his mom. It doesn’t matter how many times you walk through an orchard in September, each trip carries its own memories. We can make it ours by turning it into a tradition: maybe we pick a “dad and son” apple that we always eat right there in the field, juice running down our arms. Maybe we can bring home the extras and bake a pie together, even if it ends up looking more like a science experiment than dessert. As long as we have whipped cream, it’ll be delicious.

Pumpkin carving will stay on the list, too. But this year, I’ll turn it into a road trip. We’ll pick a place we haven’t been before and drive to get a pumpkin. We’ll discover the local attractions and turn it into a mini adventure. We’ll take a picture of the jack-o-lantern with the candle glowing inside and put that picture on the wall for the season. It’ll be a new ritual that’s less about the pumpkin and more about expanding our horizons.

And of course, Halloween. He loves dressing up in a scary costume and running around the neighborhood with his friends, running from house to house for candy, and experiencing the thrill of the night. I’ll let him lead the charge on costumes, even if that means I end up being the sidekick to whatever villainous monster he becomes. That’s part of the fun, stepping into his world for an evening, letting the night be about his imagination.

But I also want new rituals that reflect where we are now. A fall hike, just the two of us, where we bring a small notebook and sketch or jot down what we notice, maybe the way the leaves crunch, the smell of pine needles, the silence broken by a distant crow. Or a night walk under the earlier stars, where we’ll talk about how the world shifts around us when the seasons change.

And Thanksgiving; I want that to mean something deeper than just food. I’d like us to volunteer together, maybe at a food pantry or community dinner. I don’t know where yet, but I know the act of serving side by side will teach him more than any conversation ever could. Gratitude isn’t just something you feel; it’s something you practice.

We’ll pick…

The truth is, I don’t want to design these traditions for him anymore. He’s older now, old enough to help create them. So I plan to sit down with him and ask: What do you want our Fall traditions to be? Which ones do you love, and what new ones should we invent? I want him to feel that sense of ownership, that what we’re building is ours, not just mine, handed down to him.

Fall itself is a season of transition — the trees letting go of what they no longer need, the days shifting toward rest. This year, I’m going to let that change mirror my own. I can’t hold on to the past, but I can shape the future: one ritual, one memory, one shared moment at a time.

Maybe that’s what Fall is really teaching me, that there is true beauty inherent in change, and that letting go is not the end of something, but the beginning of something new.

🍁 A Call to Other Parents

If you’re a parent, especially one navigating shared time, I’d love to hear from you: What Fall rituals do you and your children keep, and which new ones have you created? How do you turn seasons of change into seasons of connection? Share your traditions; maybe they’ll inspire new ones for the rest of us.

#Parenting,  #Fatherhood,  #DadLife, #SingleParenting,  #CoParenting, #FamilyTraditions, #FallVibes, #AutumnVibes, #FallFeels, #CreatingMemories